My Journey

I don't want to post a negative post, so I won't.

Hooping
As you may have already read at Mary's and Shiny Ruby's blog, hooping was an absolute blast and I enjoyed myself so much. Sure I stood right at the front with the floor to ceiling mirrors pointing out each and every flaw in my hooping technique, but after a few minutes and many false starts I could look at my reflection without bursting out laughing. Really it was all I could do to catch my flying hoop before it flew off and hit someone else (and I do need to apologise to Emilie and Sarah - sorry guys you copped more than your fair share). Two hours and a lot of sweating and laughing later I am now the proud owner of my very own hoop. My hoop that will help sculpt my abs and build up my core muscle control. My hoop that makes me smile as I think about it and makes me want to get out and move my butt. And my arms. And my legs. My hoop that I am having a little bit of an obsessive affair with. LOL. If you haven't already been to check out the photos of the day I highly recommend a visit to the set provided by Mary and the set provided by the extraordinary Bunny. We are all there in our hooping gloriousness. (thanks guys for taking the time to take and post the photos)

If you want a giggle, or are interested, there are a heap of great hooping links that Bunny provided below. Just checking out Fat Boy Slim's new video is guaranteed to get you remembering (with glee or horror) your own hooping experiences as a child.

http://www.youtube.com/group/learnhooptricks
http://www.hoopnotica.com/
http://www.groovehoops.com/newreel.html


Archery
If by now you are slightly interested in joining us in a new learning experience this is the heads up to say that Archery will probably be the next target (eww that was a bad pun) and more information will be forthcoming. Can't wait to see what damage I can do with a sharp pointy object LOL.

Issues
I have issues at the moment. Issues that are getting me down. That I fight through. That I am happy with. And that get me down again. It is just a bit of a struggle balancing all I need to do with all I want to do. I found myself in the last week and a bit drinking a wee bit more regularly than I should be, and in greater quantities than is healthy. This led to a bit of a introspective look at myself, my reactions to people, my feelings towards myself that really should have been solved with a kick up the arse rather than allowing myself to go in deeper. So kick up the arse I am getting. Or KUTA for short. Instead of being all talk and no action I am adopting a new policy of no talk and all action. At least for a little while. After discussing my issues at length with a real person (not a blogger *gasp*) we have buddied up to help each other out of very similar slumps. This involves complete honesty. No judgment. And me doing instead of saying. I am in KUTA Day 2 at the moment and so far so good. I am relearning some pretty basic habits and whilst it is hard making this a top priority again I am sure that within a week or two of constantly reminding myself that I am worth it and practicing the good habits that I need to make, I will be back on top of it again. And if in the meantime, my house gets cleaned, the laundry gets done, all the bills are paid, and children go to sleep on time and stay asleep all night - in their own beds, I will be a very happy camper indeed. I will probably be asleep and it will all be a dream but I will be happy. ;D

So following on from that I won't be posting for a while - but no time frames or restrictions. If something BRILLIANT happens you will all be the first to know (all million of you LOL). I will be reading and commenting where I can after I have done my exercises in the evening and all other chores are done. I am not going to lose my grip on where you are all up to in your lives because you are all too motivating and inspirational for me to just let go.

Here is to KUTA. And a great big one at that!

Posted by Margaret at 10:19:00 pm | Permalink | Comments

The morning did not start off exactly to plan with little Oscar deciding that today he was going to be sick. I am sure it had a lot to do with the copious amount of sugar he consumed at his party but also the peak of a cold he had been carrying around. So a morning vomit in our bed was an indication that all was not well (and dammit I had just changed the sheets!!) After I showered and dressed in my super cool outfit for the walk he vomited on me again. I was starting to get concerned that I would not have an outfit to wear. After seriously considering my pj pants I went with an old winter weight size 16 trackie pants. They were hot but they did the job.

Linda and I headed in to the registration line up as I had lost my bib and met up with Michelle there. I am so grateful that they are as calm as they were as I was starting to get a bit worried that we would miss the race altogether as the line seemed to take FOREVER. However, after a rough start we were ready to join the throng as the 4th gun went off. We shuffled together until we past the start line (about 10 minutes after the first person in our group) then we found a little space to pick up the pace. As I looked forward the road dipped away and the sheer number of people took my breath away. It was fantastic to be part of such a big group and just getting out there and doing my own thing. After a short jog through the William St tunnel (which I thought would never end by the way LOL) Michelle broke away to continue her running and Linda and I strode out as the space freed up even more. It was so easy walking with Linda. We may be different heights, have a different walking style, but we think so similarly that it was a real hoot. Linda would see a gap 2 or 3 gaps ahead and just make a jogging bee line for it, and I would follow or make my way around a different way. There was never any pressure to keep up, or stay by each others side. We just walked comfortably together.

The atmosphere was electric. Helped by the numerous bands lining the route entertaining us all. My favourite bit was as we came up to the top of Heartbreak Hill and noticed the 7km marker. We had done it in just a couple of minutes over an hour. That was pretty good. There was a garage on our right with a group of people on top. As we rounded the corner they pressed play on their CD player and the music from Chariots of Fire starting blaring out with the visual of all of them starting to run in slow motion. It was hilarious and really helped to keep the spirit up and keep moving. There was never one moment when I considered giving up. Sure if the course had been shorter I would have been happy to stop but I was in this for the final. I felt pretty good all the way. My big toes hurt (???) and I got a bit of chafing under my arm due to the backpack - but that was it.

The stats came out in the paper today and Linda and I finished 1 minute apart but that 1 minute made a difference in our finishing positions. Out of the 53,000+ people who actually finished Linda came in 36,576 and I came in at 36,582 (sorry about the typo in the earlier email Linda LOL) Our own time showed that we finished in 2hrs and 10mins. That's roughly 20,000 steps in my length.

And the best thing?? My recovery. On Monday morning I woke up with the only pain being that of the sunburn I received to my shoulders and chest, and a little hip flexor stiffness. Other than that - nothing. I was so happy. I got ready to go to work and take the boys into kindy but whilst we were at kindy Oscar was sick again and spiked a temperature so I turned around and took him home again. I made sure to ring half a dozen people at work though to tell them that it was not the results of the walk keeping me home. I really wanted to go in and show off but that will have to wait until next year now. Today was pretty good too. Again the only soreness I am feeling is in my hips so a visit to the chiro has been scheduled in.

It was the best fun and I have learnt enough on what I need to do to make it better for next year. So who else is in :D


(Blogger won't let me post photos anymore - after it had lost the ones I did put on here. I will update tomorrow)

Posted by Margaret at 9:15:00 pm | Permalink | Comments

More than anything I want to say "thank you" to all the bloggers who came to the dinner. There were a lot for whom the dinner was the first time they had crossed the line between cyber and real. And that is hard. It takes guts to be able to walk into a room of people that you don't know and stand there and introduce yourself and hug and greet people that you know so well - but don't know at all. I had a great time and great conversations that have helped to give a 3D personality to a relationship that is all about support.

And it was a bit of an eye opener to sit back and reflect that it has been almost a year since I first met Mary and Cath when we did the Diabetes Walk for a Cure. I still remember the feelings of wanting to text and dip out, even though I organised it!! And I was only meeting 2 people. I had a great time during the meal and managed to get to meet and talk to everyone there. Some more than others but you get that in a big crowd.

Cass, Stella, Nicole, Kathryn and I sat at one table and it is incredible that you can learn so much about people in such a short space of time. I had a delicious meal (though found out later that not everyone had the same result) of pasta, neapolitana sauce with ricotta. Yummmmo. But dinner was not all about sitting in one spot. We all table hopped and chatted and it is really funny that the only 2 people I really didn't have a chance to talk to much was Mary and Cath. But as we catch up the most I think I can survive and will have to hold on until Sunday when we meet up again for the Hula Hooping Lesson. What fun that will be!!

The guys at the other table: - Bron, Jodie, Linda, Sarah, Michelle, Mary and Cath I had already met, but Briony, Tamara, Melissa, and Marion (Cath's Mum) were new to me and lovely to meet. I had spoken with almost all by email previously so it was great to jump in and talk to them for real.

After dinner some of us headed to the Fortune of War for a few more drinks (as if I needed any more by that stage LOL) and I had to admit after a little while my yawning was embarrassing even me so I made a move home. Sitting with Linda at the dining table going over the plan for the next morning was a good chance to enjoy the silence (boy am I getting old) and get my mind around the fact that I would be walking almost 15kms in less than 10 hours time. Goodnight!


(The lovely ladies in the photo are: L-R Kathryn, Linda, Briony, Sarah, Nicole, Cass, Michelle, Me (right at the back), Melissa, Stella, Bron, Cath, Marion, Tamara, Mary)

Posted by Margaret at 9:10:00 pm | Permalink | Comments

I was never more happy when Saturday dawned clear and warm. It meant that I had half a chance of fitting in 16 kids and 18 adults without having to play muscial chairs. With not enough chairs LOL. The day was BRILLIANT. Even when people starting arriving 15 minutes early (note to everyone - don't ever come 15 minutes early - those last 15 minutes are crucial!!)

Linda was smart and jumped ship to meet up with Mary before the fraccas but I have to admit, it was a pretty fun party to hang around.

The kids ran and ran and ran some more in the soccer field we set up in the back garden and the plethora of soccer balls meant there were no fights. Everyone played games, the piniata was a hit (even though I made it so well that nothing fell out and I ended up having to rip it in half LOL).

The "Go For Goal" game I created drew lots of laughter and I got heaps for taking a photo of Darcy dressed in nothing but his undies and Wellington boots. I say if he wants to dress like Astro Boy, let him :) I try to make sure he is at least dressed when we leave the house LOL.

After gorging on as much fairy bread, fruit, party pies and ice cream cake as they possibly could, the party broke up and the clean up started. It didn't take long and Linda timed her entrance perfectly (thanks for helping with the dishes). Marks parents were here for the party too and they had the best time. It was great seeing them interact with the boys as they don't see that much of them.

When the boys went for a lie down at half past four it gave me a chance to get ready for the bloggers dinner. I didn't know it then but found out later that the boys didn't wake up for the rest of the night. I hope Mark knows how lucky he is that the ONLY babysitting duty he has had to do involved doing nothing *mutter mutter mutter*

I am glad my little man had a wonderful day, and very happy that everyone who came seemed to have a great time too. Lots of laughing and playing and being silly. Just like life should be ;D

Posted by Margaret at 9:00:00 pm | Permalink | Comments

Yesterday (before lunch)

I tried to gain weight this week. Really put the sort of effort in that I should be directing the other way. It started off by me eating my way through the pantry and finishing off EVERY piece of birthday party stuff that was left over from filling the goodie bags and the piniata. I ate packs of crisps, freddos, freddo heads, lollies, lollypops and I am sure there was more. I shudder to think that the party hasn't even happened yet and I need to shop for food for the day. It then spiraled into an anger filled frenzy and when I couldn't find anything else I set about making cheese and bacon pancakes - just so I could have something to eat. I mean I COULD have eaten the fresh fruit I have. Or I could have had vegetables or better yet, just drunk water but Nooooooooo. I needed to punish someone and who better than me, because I am there. * sigh *. I don't understand it. My anger was not towards me. It was for someone else. But I get frustrated and know there is no point getting angry at them so I direct it inward. Luckily for me there was also this intense desire to walk this weekend and walk I did. So when I got on the scales I was shocked to see they registered a "no - change" leaving me at 77kgs. Part of me wishes it had jumped 5kgs to put the fear back in me and the other part is just grateful that it stayed the same. I am a very positive person, naturally, and usually jump out of bed being able to see the sunshine and accepting that I will get where I want (physically, emotionally, financially) but this weekend knocked me for a six and I have to admit that when I got us this morning I wasn't really sure of anything anymore.

Yesterday (after lunch)

Before I started my blog I had friends I could count on less that one hand. One girl from work - MF and a couple of other Mums I met at the ante-natal classes. And those Mums were all skinny and beautiful and whilst I know that they didn't keep inviting me around because I made them look good, I always knew that I kept myself a little apart from them. Then the blog started. Along with the increase of confidence in myself as I changed physically I grew mentally as my friendships with people on-line grew. It started with comments left on blogs. A bit of a one way conversation but just what I needed. Then, like in real life, closer bonds formed with a few that really clicked for me. The blog comments started turning into email conversations. Real two way conversations. Soon the blog did not necessarily necessitate the beginning of a chat. An email would just appear, or I would just send one to say Hi and on it went. This has now developed where I am comfortable enough to pick up the phone and ring someone to have a chat and forego the internet altogether. Or not. There is no pressure, there is no obligation, so when we talk, when we meet up - it is real and it is FUN.

So anyway yesterday I received such an email. Out of the blue and a great wake up to me that the world is not just about me and that other people have the same angers, needs, wants, as me and also need a place to vent when the blog seems just a touch too public. I am so grateful that I have friends like this now and know that it has made me become the better person that I am.

So on to Today

Today is completely different. Today I woke up with an expectation of joy and happiness and excitement. Because today is not about me. Today is about my baby Oscar who turned 2 this morning. As I lay in bed snuggling with both Oscar and Darcy whilst Mark got ready I was smiling thinking about how excited the boys would be when we went out the back and they discovered the 30 odd balloons I blew up last night and the table covered in presents. We all raced out the back as my Mum rang to say Happy Birthday. I knew it was only 5.45am in Adelaide so appreciated the gesture. We opened the present from her and Dad whilst she was on the phone. Oscar managed to yell Thanks Oma almost at the same time he was yelling WOW as he ripped the paper off to reveal "Charlie the Talking Grill". How hilarious. It is a small BBQ that has eyes and a mouth and talks as you press down the sausage or the burger and when you take the Ketchup or Mustard out of their holders, they speak to you. He LOVES it. I am so happy for Mum that she got to share that with us. I love my speaker phones - it makes sharing this stuff so much easier.. Then it was back to the ripping of paper and as the Wiggles books and plate set were revealed we got more WOW's and the smiles just kept on going.

I feel really lucky today.

And I am going to take that feeling and run with it. :D

Posted by Margaret at 8:59:00 am | Permalink | Comments

Posted by Margaret at 6:00:00 am | Permalink | Comments