Dumps & Jumps
All week I have been in a bit of a down mood. Not enough that I exhibit sad behaviour outwardly, and not enough that I can't get a kick out of a good joke, or react to a tantilising blog entry. But privately, inwardly, I have been a bit sad. The sadness normally only starts to kick in with destructive type behaviour when I am at home. Since that is where the sadness currently resides. It is not my Mum or anything terminal or anything like that. But it is a trust issue and I haven't yet bounced back in my actions as quickly as I have in my words.
During quiet patches at work where my brain does not have to fully engage I also get a bit sad and tend to wander into territory that is not so good for me. Like into the fiendish box of Dark Choc Crisp Mint bars. (As a side note - these are magnificent. They taste like Arnotts mint slices but unfortunately I have the same problem with both - I have not yet learnt to only have one).
So this afternoon I took myself off for a walk to get a drink and to buy a magazine. I thought it would take my mind off things. I was checking out the gossip ones, the home ones, and glanced over the fitness ones. One magazine jumped out at me. It is the Oct/Nov issue of Oxygen. On the cover is Brandy Flores. She is hot!. But the entire magazine is devoted to "Buff Mums". It gives you exercises to do whilst you are pregnant so that you are better able to bounce back after the birth, it gives you things to do post birth, and it even gives sods like me a chance who didn't do anything before or after and now want to flatten out the old tummy area. There are also some pretty scary looking ladies in there who go the whole hog with body building but I will take the information I am comfortable with and use that. My bathers arrived last week so there is no excuse now. I will take the 'before' photo's this weekend and work out a manageable program to do at home. Then I will take regular photo's to track the changes. When I am satisifed that I can actually see some changes I will get Jonny to help me morph them altogether.
If that don't work then it's off to the lipo fairy for a bit of a vaccuming ;)
During quiet patches at work where my brain does not have to fully engage I also get a bit sad and tend to wander into territory that is not so good for me. Like into the fiendish box of Dark Choc Crisp Mint bars. (As a side note - these are magnificent. They taste like Arnotts mint slices but unfortunately I have the same problem with both - I have not yet learnt to only have one).
So this afternoon I took myself off for a walk to get a drink and to buy a magazine. I thought it would take my mind off things. I was checking out the gossip ones, the home ones, and glanced over the fitness ones. One magazine jumped out at me. It is the Oct/Nov issue of Oxygen. On the cover is Brandy Flores. She is hot!. But the entire magazine is devoted to "Buff Mums". It gives you exercises to do whilst you are pregnant so that you are better able to bounce back after the birth, it gives you things to do post birth, and it even gives sods like me a chance who didn't do anything before or after and now want to flatten out the old tummy area. There are also some pretty scary looking ladies in there who go the whole hog with body building but I will take the information I am comfortable with and use that. My bathers arrived last week so there is no excuse now. I will take the 'before' photo's this weekend and work out a manageable program to do at home. Then I will take regular photo's to track the changes. When I am satisifed that I can actually see some changes I will get Jonny to help me morph them altogether.
If that don't work then it's off to the lipo fairy for a bit of a vaccuming ;)
I can understand the inside sadness this week, hope u are feeling lots better soon!
Oh i have missed the choc crisp bars since i stopped going to WW meetings - its probably a good thing!
Posted by
Kt |
October 21, 2005 8:00 pm
I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling sad. We have to allow ourselves to feel things. At least you can admit it instead of locking it away and pretending its not there.
You've achieved such amazing things over the past seven months -you're an incredibly capable, kind and wonderful person who is an inspiration to so many people. I don't know whether I would have stuck to my own plan if it hadn't been for you. I know it took me ages to start commenting on your posts, but all the while I was reading every word you wrote, nodding along. When I had my down days, I would tell myself "think of M, that's going to be me too!" And here I am, six months later, still going!
I don't think you'll be needing the lipo fairy somehow :)
Let me know how you go at T2. The turkish apple one was beautiful - it tasted like apple juice, not like tea! I think you'd like it.
Have a good one xo xo
Posted by
philippa_moore |
October 21, 2005 9:17 pm
I see you have also discovered the EVIL choc mint crisp bars - they are good, too good.
That woman on the front cover of Oxygen is hot - Why can't I look like that *looks down at empty packet of choc crips bars* hmm. I may go and buy it tomorrow.
Inner sadness is a strange thing because you know you have it but usually know one else does - i hope you feel better about what ever happened soon. I could write more but Philipa beat me too it.
Thanks for your post and comments - and have great weekend.
Posted by
Anonymous |
October 21, 2005 9:42 pm
I am sending you warm wishes and hope you are not too sad for too long,
Love
Cheers
Margaret
Posted by
Anonymous |
October 22, 2005 6:45 am
Oh babe! I am so sorry you are still feeling like this. I've been a bit distant this week because I am still ill and feel a bit sorry for myself. I hope things work themselves out. Can you sit down and talk about it with the person involved? Bigs *HUGS* sista. Shitty situations never last long if you don't let them. Tackle it like you would weight loss, head on and being honest with the sensitivity that it needs.
Posted by
Mary |
October 22, 2005 7:30 am
Hope you feel happier soon and things work out OK. Talk to someone - remember "a trouble shared is a trouble halved"!
You deserve to feel happy.
Just looked at Brandy. What a body!
Just a bit flatter stomach would be nice. I'm afraid I was one of those Mums who didn't do the tummy exercises after childbirth and my little pot is still there. I'm working on mine now though too.
Posted by
Suzy |
October 22, 2005 10:16 am
NOt good M to bottle this in as you know. Being sad is just that soooo SAD. I really hope your inner meery self comes bursting out and overtakes the sad one. Of course if theer is something you can do todeal with the issue then try to do that. If not then you just have to let it go. I know easy tosay and sooo hard to do. I just said to my daughter today about some mean people she has to deal with "they are inconsequential. They can only hurt you if you let them. Do not even bother to breathe the air they breathe. Let them and their mean spirits wash over you."
Great idea about the toning program you are undertaking. And I must say I have also started to wish for a lippo fairy or similar.
Posted by
michelle |
October 22, 2005 2:03 pm
The morphing that Jonny does is fantastic isn't it. I was wanting to do that with my first and last photo... would be so cool.
I am not sure what you are sad about but I do understand the feeling. I was like that on Thursday and just wanted to be left alone and felt quite down. I think that is why I wrote my message that night stating I am going for it.
Girl I love reading your journal!
CM
Posted by
Chubbymum |
October 22, 2005 2:35 pm
Hope you are feeling better soon M, thinking of you. xx
Posted by
Kate |
October 22, 2005 6:57 pm
M I'll let you into a secret. I went and saw a counsellor on Thursday. Some personal issues that I needed to sort out. Great for getting it all out and being able to speak to someone who is just a sounding board and is non judgemental. I really know where you're coming from.
And can I come with you when you visit the lipo fairy? LOL!
Posted by
Jaykay |
October 22, 2005 7:01 pm
Sorry to hear about the sadness. You are terribly important to this circle, I read you every day and you inspire me to be better. Many cyber hugs to you - it will pass.
Posted by
Julie's Journey |
October 22, 2005 7:49 pm
Sorry to hear you are feeling down:)
Hope things are better now!
Posted by
Leighanne |
October 23, 2005 9:41 am
I'm sorry to hear that you're not feeling like your usual cheery self. I hope that you're able to sort out whatever it is that's getting you down and get back into the swing of things. I wish that none of us had to go through these patches, but a wise woman once said to me that we have to experience the down times to make the good times even better. It's all part of the human experience (I know it doesn't make it any easier by me saying that. Sorry.) Sending lots of hugs and kisses your way.
P.S. Thanks for mentioning the magazine. I might look out for it, and, I might even do some of those exercises! If you're lucky...
Posted by
Kellee |
October 23, 2005 8:52 pm
BTW, something to make you laugh, perhaps...
I took your challenge about the 23rd post, and this is what my sentence was.
"Silly things, like the time Mum was carrying him in the pouch when he was about 4 months old and he decided to wee 3 times and vomit on her all in the space of about two minutes in the middle of a shopping centre, on the floor of Myer."
He he he.
Posted by
Kellee |
October 23, 2005 9:21 pm