Weigh Day - 10th July
If I was doing a letter of the alphabet today to describe where I am I would have to pick the letter 'o'.
Overwhelmed:- It seems that at the moment I am overwhelmed by a lot of things. There is so many 'big picture' things going on - the housework, finances, weight, schooling for the boys, that I am in a constant feeling of "will it ever all just be alright?" and that feeling has made me feel a little strange this week.
On my own:- Even though I have a lovely family there are times lately that I feel like I am on my own, and everything needs to be done by me. This is frustrating to me and I feel like sometimes I would be better off by myself so that I don't rely on other people to do things. But I know I don't mean it and I always feel guilty afterwards for thinking like that.
Old:- I never thought I would ever say these words but I feel old at the moment. I think it is because of the other two "o's" but I am starting to feel my age. (I am ONLY 37!)
Honesty:- (well it sounds like it could start with an 'o'). After having a wonderful chat with a friend from over the equator I thought long and hard about honesty and what it means to me when I apply it to myself. I feel that I am not always honest to myself. And I am not honest by omission. If I am being less than I need to be, or I feel less than I think I should be, I disappear and don't write. (And in real life I go quiet). I can be supportive of others but I am far less supportive of myself. What a strange existence this is to live in. So I decided to be honest and admit to myself that I am overwhelmed at the moment and set a plan of action in place to tackle it. Being scared of the big picture is very normal and what I need to do is break it down into little pictures and tackle each one, one at a time.
Housework: Tackle one room at a time before the inspection on Friday. We will not be evicted because there are some toys on the floor or because the toilet paper rolls the wrong way.
Finances: Tackle one credit card at a time - don't think about the sum total (even though I could probably buy a couple of great small cars with it)
Weight: Well I have broken the back of this one but I need to focus on each week and not think about birthdays, anniversaries (10 years this year), Christmas etc. It will come when it comes.
Schooling: Accept that it is still going to cost an arm and a leg to have Darcy in before and after school care and trust that I will be able to work out a way to pick him up before school locks him in for the night (I am having nightmares about this already and he doesn't start till February)
On top of it:- Today I stepped on the scales and it has shown me a loss of 300gms. Whoo Hooo. So I am finally out of the 77's with a jump to 76.8kgs. I had a good week. Not a perfect week, but a good one so I am happy that I know there is still room for improvement, but that there was room for a loss as well. This sent me to work in a great frame of mind and during my lunch time walk today I broke a personal best record and jogged 6 light poles. Go me :). I think I may start timing these little runs and start with a time and build up from that from now on. Thinking about it the run was probably not more than 2 minutes in total so I have a very good base to build on LOL.
Global Corporate Challenge
I can't believe it is 47 days in and our team has walked over 4.5 million steps. Incredible! We are currently in Germany and visiting places I remember fondly when I was there in 1992 & 1999. This came hot on the heels of drinking my way through Italy and visiting all the wonderful islands in Greece (though the challenge only - have not been there in real life). Ahhh it is warm in Europe today. 30 degrees. I can just feel it...... Which helps when trying to work out how to keep the teams motivation up. We have slipped out of the top 50 overall and are only just managing to stay in the top 10 for our company. I have sent a suitably witty and hopefully motivating email to the team so we will see what happens this week.
Things I did well this week
I did not drink alchohol (even though I could have murdered a bottle of bourbon)
I kept up my walking even though I felt quite unwell for most of the week
I finally decided on a theme for Oscars birthday and I have sent out the invitations.
Things I will do better this week
I will not eat pizza.
I will not eat pizza.
I will relax and not look at the bigger picture this week.
Overwhelmed:- It seems that at the moment I am overwhelmed by a lot of things. There is so many 'big picture' things going on - the housework, finances, weight, schooling for the boys, that I am in a constant feeling of "will it ever all just be alright?" and that feeling has made me feel a little strange this week.
On my own:- Even though I have a lovely family there are times lately that I feel like I am on my own, and everything needs to be done by me. This is frustrating to me and I feel like sometimes I would be better off by myself so that I don't rely on other people to do things. But I know I don't mean it and I always feel guilty afterwards for thinking like that.
Old:- I never thought I would ever say these words but I feel old at the moment. I think it is because of the other two "o's" but I am starting to feel my age. (I am ONLY 37!)
Honesty:- (well it sounds like it could start with an 'o'). After having a wonderful chat with a friend from over the equator I thought long and hard about honesty and what it means to me when I apply it to myself. I feel that I am not always honest to myself. And I am not honest by omission. If I am being less than I need to be, or I feel less than I think I should be, I disappear and don't write. (And in real life I go quiet). I can be supportive of others but I am far less supportive of myself. What a strange existence this is to live in. So I decided to be honest and admit to myself that I am overwhelmed at the moment and set a plan of action in place to tackle it. Being scared of the big picture is very normal and what I need to do is break it down into little pictures and tackle each one, one at a time.
Housework: Tackle one room at a time before the inspection on Friday. We will not be evicted because there are some toys on the floor or because the toilet paper rolls the wrong way.
Finances: Tackle one credit card at a time - don't think about the sum total (even though I could probably buy a couple of great small cars with it)
Weight: Well I have broken the back of this one but I need to focus on each week and not think about birthdays, anniversaries (10 years this year), Christmas etc. It will come when it comes.
Schooling: Accept that it is still going to cost an arm and a leg to have Darcy in before and after school care and trust that I will be able to work out a way to pick him up before school locks him in for the night (I am having nightmares about this already and he doesn't start till February)
On top of it:- Today I stepped on the scales and it has shown me a loss of 300gms. Whoo Hooo. So I am finally out of the 77's with a jump to 76.8kgs. I had a good week. Not a perfect week, but a good one so I am happy that I know there is still room for improvement, but that there was room for a loss as well. This sent me to work in a great frame of mind and during my lunch time walk today I broke a personal best record and jogged 6 light poles. Go me :). I think I may start timing these little runs and start with a time and build up from that from now on. Thinking about it the run was probably not more than 2 minutes in total so I have a very good base to build on LOL.
Global Corporate Challenge
I can't believe it is 47 days in and our team has walked over 4.5 million steps. Incredible! We are currently in Germany and visiting places I remember fondly when I was there in 1992 & 1999. This came hot on the heels of drinking my way through Italy and visiting all the wonderful islands in Greece (though the challenge only - have not been there in real life). Ahhh it is warm in Europe today. 30 degrees. I can just feel it...... Which helps when trying to work out how to keep the teams motivation up. We have slipped out of the top 50 overall and are only just managing to stay in the top 10 for our company. I have sent a suitably witty and hopefully motivating email to the team so we will see what happens this week.
Things I did well this week
I did not drink alchohol (even though I could have murdered a bottle of bourbon)
I kept up my walking even though I felt quite unwell for most of the week
I finally decided on a theme for Oscars birthday and I have sent out the invitations.
Things I will do better this week
I will not eat pizza.
I will not eat pizza.
I will relax and not look at the bigger picture this week.
YOUR NOT OLD!!!! It sounds like you are having a stressful time at the moment, but you are right - you are not going to get evicted for mess - they are looking for holes in walls and burnt floors!!
Have you got an opportunity to run yourself a bath and read a magazine, even just for 20 minutes?!
Posted by
Unknown |
July 10, 2006 5:06 pm
Do you feel better for getting all of that written down.. looks like a checklist to me.. things that you need to accept.. sort out etc.. Well done also on your loss.. Schooling is such a hard decision... So.. What was the theme for Oscar's birthday..looking for ideas myself for Hugh...
Posted by
Yummy Mummy |
July 10, 2006 5:18 pm
YOU ARE NOT OLD!
Plus you are a wonderful woman!
Now we have that sorted. LMAO
Well done for your loss in the past week - 300g is great work. No alcohol is even better.
Good Luck for your week ahead! I know you can do so well! You know you can do so well. Don't let worry take over because worry doesn't help.
Hugs!
Posted by
Jadey |
July 10, 2006 5:19 pm
The part of this post that stuck out the most for me is the murdering of the bottle of bourbon.
Maybe you need to cut down on your commitments. One of the easiest ways of lowering your stress levels.
Take it easy, almost-murderer.
Posted by
Daniel Hatadi |
July 10, 2006 5:21 pm
You're only as old as you feel and at 37 you don't have anything to worry about! The way you broke down the bigger picture is really cool and shows insight - I hope it helped clear your mind too!!
And great job on the no alcohol too!! Very impressed! Oh dear I feel like I'm in AA now!
Posted by
yublocka |
July 10, 2006 6:11 pm
I think you deserve a medal for not drinking, I would love to have an AFW (Alcohol Free Week) in fact i'd be happy with an AFD at the moment!! LOL.
I know you feel like you're a bit swamped right now, but remember, the sleep deprivation makes everything seem so much worse.
Well done on your loss too, and running the power poles!
Bri
Posted by
Briony |
July 10, 2006 6:15 pm
Yep, 37, ancient. I bet you feel younger than you did before you started losing weight.
Posted by
Sue |
July 10, 2006 6:49 pm
I found myself agreeing with you on lots in this post. I too need to tackle one debt (card/loan) at a time. I also need to focus on each week (day? hour?), rather than birthdays, Christmas, etc.
Do something nice for yourself this week! You deserve it with all that stressing you are doing :o)
Posted by
Unknown |
July 10, 2006 6:50 pm
its so much easier to stress over things though isnt it than to actually do it? so like me! spend so much time making plans that the action bit gets left behind. but with me.....th bourbon would be gone!
Posted by
Anonymous |
July 10, 2006 7:42 pm
I love how you think M - being honest with yourself is the first step to admitting to worries/difficulties so you can constuct to plan to sort things through.
As far as the weight's concern, well done on another week with a loss!
Posted by
Ails |
July 10, 2006 8:52 pm
day by day, you will get through it all...thinking of it all at once is too much, one penny at a time, one morsel of food at a time, one step at a time.
you will just keep on going because its the only way to keep sanity. now, dont forget to stop by for some coffee when you're walking through :)
Posted by
Cat |
July 10, 2006 8:54 pm
Well done on jogging 6 light poles - not bad for an old chickie lol. I'd love to be 37 again!
Looking at the big picture may work in the corporate world but I can never adapt that to my life - it doesn't work and it is too overwhelming.
I'll also have similar school stress next year. Fun times ahead.
Have a great week. xx
Posted by
Cinders |
July 10, 2006 9:17 pm
I've been trying to leave a message but your site hasnt been co-operating...
Do you blog from work? Do you know someone called John?
Because 'he' has been commenting on my site using your IP address.
Thought I'd bring it up with you.
Posted by
The Candid Bandit |
July 11, 2006 1:01 am
Your only as old as the man you feel! LOL!! This only causes a problem when hubby is in his 60's!!
Well done on your loss this week. You know there is room for improvements but taking one step at a time is definately the way to go. Tackling all at once is too much and will usually end in burnt out. Congrats! XX
Posted by
Anonymous |
July 11, 2006 8:35 am
Hoorah for 76.8!!!
Just a quick congratulations on 'coming clean' - having identified the things that are a bit scary / daunting / overwhelming, you're now better equipped to deal with them and follow your plan.
Here's to another great week!
Posted by
Emily Campbell - Independent Stampin' Up!® Demonstrator |
July 11, 2006 8:42 am
I bet you felt better after writing that post!
Well done on being in the 76's - all those losses add up.
Try not to stress to much about the school and after school care. I know my daughter went through a similar thing and then it just seems to fall into place. Take one day at a time.
And 37 is not old!!!!
Posted by
Anne |
July 11, 2006 9:29 am
Excellent result for you - 76.8! Slow and steady wins the race as they say.
I am truly in awe of how well you keep all those balls in the air as you continuously push yourself to be the best person you can be. You're a remarkable human being.
Wish you could come to Melbourne this weekend :)
Catch up again soon darl, have a great week xoxoxox
Posted by
philippa_moore |
July 11, 2006 9:51 am
You ran 6 light poles.....Yippee!!
Posted by
Jaykay |
July 11, 2006 12:33 pm
Cripes, If you're old at 37 what does that make me at 44. I'd better go order my mobile scooter.
I believe in the swiss cheese principle where you concentrate on one little bit at a time. Before you know it, you'll have it all covered. Pays not to look at the big picture right at the start.
I'll have no pizza with you this week either. But maybe a little bourbon or a wine instead. Deal!
Posted by
Lee-Anne |
July 11, 2006 1:53 pm
"O"K, so you may FEEL old at the moment, but you are NOT old (remember this is me who's 50 you are talking to!!!!!!).
Well done on making it to the 76's! I know I have told you before M, but you are amazing. You have so much to cope with and you are still powering towards to your goal.
Hope you are soon feeling as young and sprightly as you look. xx
Posted by
Suzy |
July 11, 2006 4:11 pm
It sounds like you have a lot going on right now but you are making steps to dealing with it...I hope the inspection goes well on Friday! You can do this: lots of hugs :)
Posted by
C |
July 12, 2006 10:28 am
Hi M....you've got the right idea at the moment so try to remain focussed on your realistic and sensible views of things....We put a great deal of pressure on ourselves at times and just need to remember to take one thing at a time. Don't forget some "M" time as well. Hang in there you can do this....lb
Posted by
Learning Leaders |
July 12, 2006 3:36 pm
Hey M, i know what ya mean its so hectic at the moment. yeah for the loss and out of the 77. hopefully i will join ya out of the 77 soon.
Hey if ya need any tips about the credit card repayments or getting your finances under control, i work in a credit union and am a loans officer, so shoot me an email or a comment and i might be able to give ya some tips
Fiona
Posted by
Baby Bump Wanted |
July 12, 2006 6:49 pm
Yep, know that overwhelmed feeling! I think we have to come to some sort of peace that it will never go away so deal with it the best you can and then forget about it...'til the next time. You have a great way of thinking and I love that you don't just wallow, you do something to change things you are unhappy about! Well done with another loss this week too :-)
Posted by
Mary |
July 12, 2006 7:08 pm
Hi Margaret.. I've just come across your blog and I will be sure to visit regularly now! I love your "letters of our Lives" - and I might borrow that idea too! And I see that you met David from BL... I chat to him occassionally and he is a lovely guy!
Well done on your weight loss so far.. you've done really well. Keep up the good work.
Posted by
Anonymous |
July 13, 2006 1:35 am
I love visiting your blog M. Your posts are so great to read.
Posted by
Anonymous |
July 15, 2006 4:49 am
Old? Um, no. Cool, sexy and fun? Yes. You're not allowed to feel old yet, especially when you've probably added years to your life by changing your habits to healthy ones. I know it all sucks sometimes (I can TOTALLY relate to feeling overwhelmed at the moment) but you know that it will pass. Sooner or later on of the kids will do something funny and it will all seem ok. You're so rad - you can do it! Sounds like I need to write YOU a war cry too...
Posted by
Kellee |
July 16, 2006 4:05 pm